No Matter What

I talked to SQ today. She had a big argument with a very close friend. Her friend was really pissed off and decided to end their friendship over a stupid misunderstanding, and was too proud to admit that they should just work things out. I've seen this before, and it sounds too familiar.

I've also tried working things out when things have gone wrong with friends. Sometimes life has a way of screwing up in ways we can't control, and this is ok. What I did was I tried my best to talk after the misunderstanding and work things out. I think it's best to immediately admit that it was really no one's fault. You see everyone has their pride. And you must understand that friends have their pride too.

I tried talking and making sure my pal knew I wasn't upset over the issue and we could talk things through, but it wasn't any use. I tried to arrange meet-ups but all I got was a cold shoulder. My friend was rude and even arrogant, but I knew I could sacrifice face for friendship. I have never dealt with a person who could treat a friend so coldly like this. I tried everything. Lowered myself where I have never done before, because I thought this friendship was important to me than my pride.

Days became weeks. I tried everything, but there was no response. To my friend, pride was more important than anything else, including this friendship. In fact I hit a rough patch when my friend recently passed away. And my friend wasn't there to help me through this when I needed a helping hand the most.

After lowering myself where I thought I wouldn't, and after dealing with my friends death. I think I then realised who my real friends are. I tried my best to save the friendship, but pride had taken over my friend, and there is nothing one can do but to do your best. This was one of my lowest periods, and what I needed was the company of my friend. But to this person, there were more important things than friendship.

I told SQ that you have to try everything you can to save a friendship even if it's not your fault. People are human. But if despite your best efforts things don't work out the way they should, then we all have to move on and let go. Life is complicated enough. There reaches a point where one has tried his best. And that's all that a person can do.

It's always sad to lose a friend. But it's never sad to lose a friend who doesn't appreciate a friendship. Talk is cheap I told SQ. If friends really appreciate you, they won't end a friendship over a misunderstanding, which her friend was doing. Appreciating friendship is not just only in the heart, it's about showing that you can take action too. Friends who appreciate you will talk things out with you even if they are angry. But pride can sometimes change people, and I've seen this myself. You know the phrase "It takes 2 hands to clap". That's all it takes.

I was talking to Al about how life has changed alot. And we both agree. I think as life gets more complicated and more demanding, you begin to realise who are the friends who always provide the most simplest and meaningful friendships. And I am grateful for them.

Alot has changed. I think lately I am no longer the same Ian. In the last term of school and over the last few weeks, I've grown up alot. And my attitude towards life is even more positive than ever. I'm glad for my closest friends. They've helped me through some hard times. And I am much grateful every day for each of them. Some friends drop out along the way, but there will always be the few who will stand beside you no matter what. I hope SQ will be able to work things out with her friend because every friendship is important.

My best pals are very much like me. Family, friends and relationships all carry equal weight. We don't sit on our lazy asses by making sure we do our best in everything we do. And we cherish our lives and our future. These are all very important things to me. And having friends who see life the way you do means alot to me. It means they understand you when you say you have a goal in life. It means they understand when you say you treasure their friendships. It means they understand every decision you make. And this is comforting knowing that they'll be behind me. No matter what.